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Gila ya, gue sekarang udah berubah menjadi workaholic yg gak jelas. Waktu gue tersita habis untuk kerja, kerja dan kerja. And speaking of kerja & kantor, gue lagi sedih banget. Om Yo mau resign bulan depan, tapi masih belum jelas sih tanggalnya.

Buat gue, dia itu orang yg super baik di kantor, bisa diajak diskusi, pinter, punya inter personal skills yg gak semua orang punya, dan bisa ngerangkul semua orang to become 1 solid team.

Kasus yg dialamin dia gak jauh dari yang pernah gue alamin waktu di Embassy dulu. Udah gak bisa ngusik kerjaan, jadi personal-lah yg diserang. Gue cukup shock ngedengernya, tapi I think that’s the best for him. Gue pernah ngerasain apa yg dia alamin and I did the same thing. Pride is much more expensive than your pay cheque. Walopun gue sedih luar biasa, tapi gue kayaknya harus ngebiasain untuk mandiri.

Susaaaaaah banget, and kalo gue lagi bengong2x mikirin dia mau cabut, gue suka nangis sendiri. Gak kebayang, kantor gue ntar kayak Titanic, sinking pelan2x krn sudah gak ada nakhoda kapal yg menyatukan orang2x disini yg kadang egoisnya lebih tinggi daripada toleransi antar sesama. Kita semua bakal kayak anak ayam keilangan induk, gak tau mesti ngadu kemana.

Intinya, gue sedih luar biasa hari2x ini… Buhuhuhuhuuuuuuuuu…

Thanks to Ati who could trace my blog and the reminder from Grace to delete the picture. Well, I actually never expect any of you would have a blog too, but what can I do, this ain’t Embassy and you guys are an up-to-date person with technology and whatever things happen.

Sebenernya gue gak mau nge-delete postingan itu G, and gak mau juga nge-remove mukedime diana intan, tapi yah, lebih baik mencegah daripada mengobati, jadilah gue apus postingan itu *dgmukasedih*

Tapi ya sudahlah.. G & Ati, kelyan diem2x aja yaaaaaahhhh, udah basi gitu loh :))

Untuk ati, adhu, g, ato sapa aja orang2x kantor gue yg ternyata dg lihainya bisa nemu blog gue (HUWUH !!), gue cuma mau ngasih tau, kalo gue udah gak crush on him lagi. Selaen udah basi, I found out ternyata orangnya itu lemeeeessss banget (in terms of not having a lively-active-spirit like me, OUCH !!)

Herannya, kenapa juga gue mesti press conf gini ke kelyan yah ? Gue cuma gak mau ada gosip yg gak jelas, ok ? Secara udah basi, trus ceweknya sekantor pula, bisa berabe beneeeeeeerrrr….

Jadi, untuk kelyan yg biang usil alias hacker gak kesampean, keep it for yourself aja. Kalo emang mau nanya2x, mendingan tanya gue langsung and never become a leaking bucket, okeh ??

Ciaooooo…

It’s been a long time I don’t write. I actually have loads of things in mind. Anyway, rather than telling what have happened to me months ago, lemme just write what happened recently.

I moved back to my momma’s house. I dunno whether it’s a forward move or backward one, but one thing I know, I kinda like it, moving back to my house, being in my room and feel so safe there. Hey, I ain’t exaggerate it, but that’s what it is.

I still have no boyfriend, which I don’t really care, but my momma does. Man, she never learns that I don’t like being questioned about a guy. Maybe if I told her that I’m a lesbian, she’d shut her mouth up. Hmmm, maybe I should’ve tried that one. It’s not her fault, asking me when I should get married, but it’s not my fault either that I don’t get any up until now. It’s not that I’m not looking for one, but the thing is, nobody attracted with me. I broaden my network, but the link keeps coming back to the old one, my inner circle and I have no complain about it.

At my age now, making new friends is quite hard. It’s either we become so active in finding them (and who knows some of them are attracted with us and we could go out together, bla bla bla) or choose the passive one, let our friends introduce us to their friend and if they are interested to us, let them be the one to reach us.

And, why are we talking about this now ? Ain’t I suppose to talk about what had happened ? The weekend ? D’oh !!

The past weekend, I spent it with the Embassy icon: g, sue, jenah, arif & mike. Friday after office hours, while I still at work, they did groceries shopping and when I finished my work, I went to Plaza Semanggi, then we altogether went to get some dinner at Muara Karang. For the second time in my life in 5 years, I went to this area. The reason why I don’t go to this place is, it’s fuckin’ far and I’d get lost if I go there. Anyway, we had seafood as our dinner. Mike was already there when we arrived, and the food was ordered too, so it only took us 5 minutes to wait for the food. It was awesome, grilled squid, clams in padang sauce, steam lodi fish, calamari, fried shrimp with garlic, stew kangkung and stew beansprout with salted fish. I was soooo full !!

We went to Arif’s place, and just in time we park the car, the storm started out and it didn’t end until 10 minutes later and it was pretty scary. Everytime the storm stroke, there must be a car’s alarm which beeping. So you could imagine how noisy and annoying it was that nite, you could hear lotsa variation of alarm sounds.

Though raining plus storm, we still went out to Babyface. Well, we actually prefer to go to bed, but grace was dying to hang out and insist us to go. It was 4 of us who didn’t wanna go, but we gave in for grace. I don’t know what made us go there, whether deep down we wanna go or it’s all because we didn’t want her to get mad at us. As for me, I chose the last one, heheheheeeeee…

We didn’t stay long, only 1 hour there. We left at 1.30am, back to the apartment, slept round 2ish, then woke up at 8.30, and I was the last one who woke up. Arif & Sue in the kitchen, cooked us breakfast, while grace were watching TV & jenah (hmmm, i forgot what she was doing that moment).

After we had our breakfast, clean up a little (sue was brooming the floor, and wanna know what she got, all my falling hair, hahahahaaaaaa…) then took off to Sukabumi at 11ish. Oya, Mike was waiting for us at the parking gate, and he didn’t bring anything but a small green postman bag. The road to go there was ok. We got there quite fast, only 1,5 hours, jammed a li’l bit at the traffic light (as we were all expected to be). We had lunch at Nusa Sari, the popular sundanese resto at Sukabumi’s area.

Afterwards we headed straight to Yenny’s villa, a nice house, with a fish pond in front, paddy rice field at the left side and right side is a mountain. So nice, so fresh air, so relaxing. Jenah & arif went a little bit of fishing, Sue were sleeping, G & me watched tv, but then I fell asleep, probably for 1 hour or so. Jenah’s maid cooked us dinner, it was a nice dinner. Actually, that dinner was intended for our lunch. Unfortunately, there’s been a miscommunication here, so Jenah’s mom didn’t call her at all, so when we got there, we saw her maid was frying a fish and on the table, it was full of food.

Around 10 pm, we went to Puncak to celebrate Sue’s birthday, her 33rd. She doesn’t look that old though, well, I guess probably I always see her almost everyweek, so I didn’t notice any changes in her. The funny thing is, we asked the pengamen to come back to our seat at 12 midnite and sang happy birthday to susan. It was quite hillarious, because we were acting crazy and they even ask us whether we had other songs in mind so they could play it. So we asked them singing TTM by Ratu and bang thoyib (dunno know who sang it).

We headed back to the villa I think around 12.30. Everybody already went back to sleep at 2, but I didn’t until 3 am, because there was World Cup 90 on SCTV. 1990 was the first world cup I saw and that was the moment I fell in love with football and decide that Italian is my number one football team.

Sunday, once again I’d be the last person to wake up, while everybody was (again) busy in the kitchen, cooking da breakfast. Hmmm,it’s only Sue, Jenah & Arif though, cause G was busy watching infotainment da morning edition and Mike was somewhere around da house, doing meditation or else :))

We finally left at 1pm, after doing some photo shoot at the rice field, almost fell off (wondering why I couldn’t get the balance while it’s an easy scene). We went to Bogor for lunch, but before, we went to gedong dalam to buy asinan buah & sayur, kue pia coklat, went to FO (arif bought 2 “banci” clothes) and then we got to mangiare for late lunch (it’s 3 pm already).

We were heading back to Jakarta at 4.30, got to PIM 2 at 5.15 (hey, I just realize that it only took me less than 1 hour to drive back to Jakarta). Got home at 6.30 and felt so damn tired. Got sms from Arif that I missed one helluva view, a girl was BJ-ing her boyfriend in da car when the traffic light showed red. Man, if I was there, I would definitely open the window and yell at them said “do it at home, you sick people”. Gee, people are getting crazier each day.

Anyhow, I felt that was one of the great weekend I had with the iconers and perhaps next month again, in Anyer.

I’ll put some photo in here (if I’m not too lazy to do so)

Sialan, gue kehilangan adaptor untuk hp gue. Padahal seinget gue, gue taro dg manisnya di meja gue. Heran, sekecil itu kok bisa ilang. Sekarang akhirnya gue harus matiin hp gue & mendivert segala telfon masuk ke hp ericsson gue. Keseeeeeeeeel banget !!

Mana gue ntar mau fitness, jadi makin lama gue nyampe kos2xannya. BT berat deh gue pokoknya !! Kok ya ada aja orang yg ngambil adaptor untuk charger HP. Aaaaaaaaaarrrrrgghhh !!

Ini salah satu foto reunian HOA yg diadain di Manna House Taman Ria tgl 12 Oktober lalu.

Cukup banyak lah yang dateng, kangen banget ama mereka, secara udah lamaaaaaaaa banget gak ketemuan.

Udah cukup banyak yg sukses, banyak yg udah punya anak, tapi kalo urusan gokil, tetep dong gak ada yg berubah :))

Btw, berhubung gue udah mau pulang, makanya nulisnya cuma sedikit.

 

Me, mom and sista, Mbak Ucik @ Planet Station in PIM 1.

Emangnya, muka kita bertiga itu sama yah ? Soalnya, most everybody said that we look alike. Mungkin krn kita share the same blood yah. Heheheheeeeeee, stoopid question and statement nih kayana 🙂

 

It’s another time to celebrate what has happened in our life at this year.

This year, it took place at Paprika @ Wahid Hasyim, dress code is sexy chic. Unfortunately, Ayu couldn’t join us since she had to go to Bandung for her colleague’s wedding party.

Though she wasn’t there, but she’s in our thought (ain’t she ?) Heheheeeeee…

It was really one of our great nite.

 

It feels like ages I don’t write anything in this blog. Well, I wanted too, but I just had no time to do it and there’s no Internet connection in my house or kost2xan.

Anyway, gue udah pindah kerja dari Embassy 3 bulan yang lalu. Sekarang gue udah menjalani pekerjaan yang lebih baik dari Embassy, walo kadang cukup bosan juga krn kerjaannya di belakang meja terus, sementara I sometimes think that I could do better than this routine work. Kalo diliat dari gaji, emang kantor baru gue ini lebih besar gajinya. Cuma tetep yah, dasarnya manusia yg gak ada puasnya, gue masih kepengen nyari yg lain. Bukan masalah gaji, tapi dari segi kualitas pekerjaan yg if someone asked me to see myself 5 years from now, I don’t see that I go anywhere else but here. Stuck banget, kecuali gue punya background engineering and gue bisa apply melamar jadi project manager-nya. Kalo ini kan, gue gak ada background apapun.

Speaking about Embassy, when I left, I did something that quite “menggemparkan” krn gue mengirim imel yg menceritakan segala kebusukan Udhy, Windy, Michelle plus Ron Hartley. Denger2x Ron ampe dipanggil DCM krn hal ini, tapi namanya juga American, pasti akan tetep membela American. Jadi, imel gue gak ada tindak lanjutnya, sementara Ron bilang ke orang2x kalo imel gue is nothing but a crap. Well, I don’t really give a fuck, yg penting gue udah keluar, and gue udah menceritakan beban2x yg ada di kepala & jiwa gue.

Sekarang sih gue masih tetep keep in touch ama anak2x Embassy, maish sering hang out untuk dinner after office hour. Yah, pokoknya ketauan deh mana yg temen baik mana yg gak. Gue inget, waktu itu gue dateng ngeliat orang2x maen bowling di EX, eh ada mbak Ade Amex. Wuaduuuuuuuuuh, buang muka bo ngeliat gue, pura2x gak liat gitu. Well, gue sih sama sekali gak ada masalah digituin, secara gue ngerasa gak pernah ngerugiin hidup dia. Lucu aja gitu ngeliatnya, wong dia gak ada di imel gue, tapi kok dia yg sewot. Mungkin krn Michelle itu temen akrabnya yah, makanya dia benci banget liat gue. Sementara Fonny & mbak Etha aja masih makan malem ama gue, padahal mereka terutama Fonny itu karibnya Windy banget, tapi still they could separate it kok. Heran deh gue..

Waktu awal2x gue disini, I surely miss the time waktu gue ama orang2x Embassy, ketawa2x gak terkendali di kantor, di courtyard, Snack Bar, pokoknya bener2x yg lepas bebas gitu. Kalo disini, selain gak ada orang2x gila yg sealiran ama gue, orangnya jaim2x trus gak ada yg diatas 45an gitu, jadi kebayang betapa egosentrisnya mereka kan ?/

Gue disini benar2x menjadi seorang yg menghindari sekali office politic, gak ada tuh yg namanya ketawa ketiwi, haha hihi ama orang2x disini. Gue ngumpul ama mereka, itupun ngomongin kerjaan, bukan personal life. Gue belajar banyak banget dari Embassy, jadi gue gak mau ada yg namanya intrik2x, stabbing from the back gitu. Gue lebih seneng ngendon di cubical gue, get busy with myself and belajar dari komputer.Oya, disini, everything runs from your own desk. Gue jarang banget bergerak, jadi kebayang lah betapa gendutnya gue, mana doyan banget ama ngemil, lengkap deh !!

Yg awalnya gue takutkan waktu pindah adl jam kerja. Gara2x kemakan cerita Irene, krn dia pulang kadang jam 9, trus wiken kerja, jadi no social life at all, huaduh, itu bener2x bikin gue stress berat. Gue ini kan seneng banget bersosialisasi, jadi denger kata2x bahwa gue harus kerja juga di wiken, asli gue langsung kepikiran. Buat gue, sosialisasi and jam tidur itu sama sekali gak bisa dibeli dg uang. Untungnya gue bisa mengatur waktu gue, dan lagipula, gue beda section ama Irene, jadi gue masih bisa lebih rileks. Gue bisa pulang teng go, paling telat setengah ampe 1 jam dari teori, trus wiken bisa leha2x di rumah and gak 24 jam on call. Yg enaknya lagi, pulsa telfon dibayarin full. Jadi mau berapa pun tagihannya, pasti akan tetep dibayarin.

Well, lebih dari itu sih, gak ada lagi yg special dari kerjaan gue. Kadang gue kangen sih ama suasana Embassy, krn disana lebih banyak bule yg keren, sementara kalo disini, walopun expat tapi gak bule. Ada bule pun, itupun udah tua ato jelek, jadi bener2x gak ada yg bisa diliat deh, and satu lagi, dah pada nikah semua. Grrrrrrr….

For over a week, I’m so under stress, thinking about the future, changing job, office’s situation. I don’t want everything falls apart. I mean, I think I’m doing a right thing in explaining what kinda situation I have in my office to someone that I believe would probably do something about it. The problem is my “bule” boss who couldn’t be objective and always take on their side, which is quite difficult for me or him maybe to move on for a follow up investigation. Well, I’m not expecting too much for that, but i think it’d be good if he could do it, so they would stop whatever they are doing rite now.

The stress on me doesn’t stop there.. I had a big argument with my mom, and I just couldn’t believe that she could do that to her own daughter. Instead of giving me a big full of support, she’s thinking the other way around. Knowing the fact is quite annoying and it really made me sad, you know. If she was someone else, I couldn’t careless about it, but it’s my mom, a woman who delivered me to this beautiful yet painful world.

Almost everynite, I slept around 12-1, I just couldn’t sleep at all. I lose words, keep sighing all da time. I don’t know what to do, I’m confused.. It really affect my ulcer, and my digestive system and eating to me these days is somewhat an obligation instead of eating because I want it to.

In 1,5 hours my life is about to change and I hope that I could stay. In a first place, I never wanna leave the Embassy, but I just have to leave this office, I’m sitting on a hot seat. I wish I could get that job, but if the answer no, thou I’m not prepared, I think I have to accept it and take the outside job. I’m still waiting for a miracle from God, but if I think about my mom, I couldn’t compete with her. God will take on her side, I believe that 100%.

This is a difficult situation I face now, a very tough one..